Ain't I A Woman?

One of the things that both intrigues and confuses me is finding the balance between my feminine nature and my feminist attitude.  I use the term "feminist" loosely because while I don't consider myself to be one of those "every evil has its origins in patriarchy" thinkers, I've always lived my life exactly the way that I've wanted to.  It never occurred to me until I began to have conversations with other women that my existence could possibly have ceilings or boundaries.

On the surface, it seems that every sensually powerful woman projects an aura that is ultimately submissive to a man.  Now of course, this makes the most independently spirited of us instinctively recoil in horror.  By definition, this means that these women appear to be tame, subdued...passive.  Isn't that what got "us" in trouble to begin with?  The reason that we feel the need to fight so hard for our voices to be heard over the dull roar of our masculine counterparts?  What does this mean for the self-sufficient modern woman that would like to recapture the power of her femininity?  What about HERstory?

I've always believed that a woman does not have to imitate masculinity in order to be powerful.  Aggression does not always initiate respect.  I've often watched my mother command the attention of an entire room by simply standing still.  My voice and mannerisms are similarly subtle.  Yet, I've often wondered how to harness that power - especially in the way that it pertains to men.  Because I am attractive, I often capture first, second and third glances, conversations and the like.  But I want more.

One of the articles that I recently read outlined steps to developing poise.  She talks about how to properly enter a room...to PAUSE...allow time for you to gather your composure before moving, while allowing people to absorb your presence.  How...utterly...powerful...

I think of how women often feel as though they need to dress provocatively, speak roughly, draw attention to themselves in overt manners.  Yet something so simple as standing still in a doorway (if done correctly - believe me - I'm practicing all over my house lol) can draw the attention of a crowd.

Now take that attitude and composure into a boardroom, committee meeting, classroom. Once the attention is captured, the audience is yours.  It reminds me of one of my favorite scenes in the latest adaptation of The Karate Kid:

"Being still and doing nothing are two entirely different things."